Requiring Verbalization

We've been busy painting and rearranging bedrooms so I haven't had much time to blog.

But, this summer has been great for my son because he's had so much interaction with his siblings. One of his sisters is especially good with working with him. She spends a lot of time playing with him and urging him to use words. He loves to be with her and usually chooses to sit with her or play with her because she's spent so much time with him. I've loved watching their relationship develop over the summer.

We've all made a goal to make him use words instead of signs. Today, he wanted some of his brother's pancake so he made a cutting motion with his hand to indicate his desire. Of course, we all knew what he wanted. We almost always know what he wants, but when we allow him to use signs we aren't helping him to develop his verbal skills.

He asked me for a drink this morning by signing it. I made him say "drink" before I gave it to him. He always signs "thank you" but now we're making him actually say the words. I think if we are more diligent in making him use words instead of signs he'll advance in his verbal skills better.

That's easier said than done, but I need to be more committed in requiring him to be verbal. I think he can be much more verbal than he is but signing is easier so he relies on that. I hoping to pull more verbalization out of him in the next few months.

Be Matched

Another concept I've learned from Play to Talk by James MacDonald and Pam Stoika is matching my son's communication level.

I tend to use long sentences and big words. I love language (one of the reasons why I'm a writer) and I love to play with words. I tend to speak in complete sentences even to my young children. I do participate in "baby talk" with infants, but that's as far as it goes. I don't favor "baby talk" with toddlers.

I've realized that my son's speech delay means that he needs me to forget my "adult" language and look specifically for ways to match his skills. Instead of saying, "Oh, look at that soccer ball rolling down the field," I need to say "I see a ball."

I need to match him in what he says and in what he wants to talk about. I've learned enough signs to have simple conversations with him and when I do that, it seems to reach him better. He understands more complicated language but he doesn't respond as well to it.

I've now started commenting on things around us in one or two words or signs. Instead of giving him a complicated set of instructions, I give him one or two words so he can respond to me more easily.

The other day, he had a runny nose. Instead of launching into a long, detailed command to get a tissue I simply said, "Bathroom, tissue," and then I acted out blowing my nose. He scampered off and returned shortly with a tissue and blew his nose for me to watch. In that exchange, we were matched.

It's important for me to remember that there's a reason he has a speech delay and that I need to rethink my communication interactions with him as opposed to how I communicated with my other kids.

A recommended exercise from this book is to imitate your child for five minutes. This will help you learn what words/signs he can and does use.

Another suggestion is to be a "living dictionary" and teach the word of what my son is doing so he begins to learn new words. When he does an action, such as kicking the ball, I'll say, "Kick ball." He already knows "ball" and now he knows "kick." I watched him to see what he was already doing and then assigned a word to that action rather than trying to teach him a word first and then the action.

Matching him means to observe what he is already doing and then use words or signs that mean something to him in a way that he can understand them.

 

4 Signs

At my son's last therapy appointment, his therapist was very pleased with his progress. He's using signs more frequently and he not only used a single sign to communicate to her what he wanted, he combined two signs. He also met other goals such as knowing at least five body parts and making comments about things (like pointing to a ball and making the sign for "ball").

She set new goals for him: combining three signs and using at least two signs to comment on things he sees or hears. This morning, I was so excited when he combined four, yes four, signs. He signed, "want," "cereal," "more," and "prayer" and then he bowed his head. He communicated that he wanted to eat but we needed to say the blessing on the food first. Yay!

His therapist doesn't want him to learn sign language per se, but rather just enough signs to communicate what he needs or wants right now so he can then make the transition into speaking. That's what I want also. It's thrilling to see him progress and use signs more to communicate. He's still pointing when he doesn't know the sign for something, but he uses signs for things he does know. I can't wait until he speaks so I can hear what's on his little mind.

Yay for progress!

My Son is Not a Blob

When my son was born, I was worried he'd be a blob. Not so. In fact, so not so. I spend most of my day chasing after him, cleaning up his messes. One of his favorite things to do is to draw all over himself with marker. Somehow, he'll always find the permanent markers that I hide and use those because they're the hardest to clean off. Highlighters are also hard to wash off.

He also loves to draw on the walls, the floor, homework papers, and the toilet bowl. Yes, the toilet bowl. I didn't even know a pen could mark up a toilet bowl, but he's proven it can be done.

Today, he decided that the books on the shelves in the library were just too tempting to leave alone. Yep, I now have a pile of books, knee-deep, in my library.

He's also become obsessed with eating ice cream bars, usually my Weight Watcher ones. He opens the freezer, grabs an ice cream bar, and eats it as fast as he can before I can find him. He doesn't like some of the bars so I find those melted under the table, on the counter, or in the bathroom sink. I can't keep him out of the freezer.

He's also become proficient at turning on the computer and clicking his way into programs that he likes. He can manuever through programs faster than I can. On one online program, he can click on it and see someone do the sign language for each letter of the alphabet. He likes to imitate the person and it's really cute. It's not cute, however, when he opens my laptop and proceeds to give me the black screen of death, you know, the one where nothing happens and my only choice is to reboot.

So, yes, my son is not a blob and while I'm very thankful that he isn't, there are days when it'd be nice if he'd just slow down for a second.